Visitors Right After Birth....No Thank You.

The excitement of a new baby is out of this world. Not just for the expectant Mom & Dad, but everybody! Grandparents, brothers & sisters, aunts & uncles, cousins, get it, everyone! 
BUT...when it comes to everyone and their moms wanting to meet your baby the day it's born...
so not for me. Actually, let's be honest- I really didn't care for many visitors the entire time I was in the hospital... here's an honest look into why.

Super Honest Reason #1:
I just gave birth to an almost 10 pound baby. It hurts to sit, it hurts to stand, it hurts to really do anything...It kind of even hurts to think (that's probably just the lack of sleep). My lady bits, down there, are swollen to a size I never knew possible (the nurse reassured me, 'yes, that's normal'...because, yes, I most definitely asked). When you're in that kind of pain, in that area, you don't necessarily feel like entertaining guests...Or at least I didn't.

Super Honest Reason #2:
I'm bleeding enough that I have on a maxi pad large enough to qualify as an adult diaper. I've already gone through 3 of the super attractive disposable hospital undies, so moving around and especially standing up in front of any visitors is not really on the list of things I want to do. I would like to get off the hospital bed and use the bathroom- but I also don't feel like leaving a blood trail to the bathroom in front of my in laws. Not to mention the hospital gown that I still have on (because lets be real, it's as comfortable as you can get without being naked) shows off my rear end- which looks super attractive in my hospital underwear and post-birth diaper. Nobody needs to see that. I don't even want to see that.

Honest Reason #3:
When I need a new ice filled adult diaper maxi pad, I don't necessarily feel like asking for it in front of visitors. Not that I couldn't ask for it in front of visitors... but lets be real, it's awkward asking for something for your lady bits with visitors sitting right beside you. I really don't need them knowing my current lady bit needs.

Honest Reason #4:
I know some women have no problem showing off their girls. But me...if you're not a doctor, or nurse, I don't want you looking at my boobs. Not saying that's what visitors are there to do...but when I need to nurse my baby- I don't want you watching. 
A: I'm still learning how to do this- it didn't come 'natural' to me. B: Gavin took a while to get a good latch. I wasn't comfortable nursing even in private yet- I was in NO WAY wanting to do it IN FRONT of visitors.

Honest Reason #5:
I'm tired. I was just in labor all night, and then proceeded to push out a 10 pound baby. I'm exhausted. I want to sleep. My eyes burn. My head hurts. Those precious couple days in the hospital are the only days you have nurses available to help you. Those precious couple days in the hospital are the only days you have a nursery that will take your baby at the push of a button. I don't know about you, but I need my sleep any chance I get, and so does my husband. We have many sleepless nights ahead of us...the visitors- do not.

Reason #6:
Why did I choose to have my baby in the hospital?...well because that's where I felt safest doing it, and to RECOVER there. See that word, RECOVER...because that's what you, or at least I, felt like I needed to do. Gavin was a BIG body needed time to recover from that, especially those first couple days after birth. It's just not a time that I want to feel like I need to entertain visitors.

Reason #7:
My newborn baby is not going to change much within the next couple weeks.
This newborn baby will still be an adorable, tiny little baby when I'm home from the hospital. I'll also be in the comfort of my home- much more willing, and actually excited, to have people come visit! Yes, those very first couple days are amazing and precious in terms of your sweet newborn baby, but horribly uncomfortable and gross for Mom (or at least this Mom).

So there you go. A very honest look into why I really didn't want many visitors right after birth. People I'm super comfortable around, (my parents, my siblings, best friends) ya, come visit! I don't care about asking for my ice filled maxi pad infront of you, or you seeing my rear end as I waddle my way to the bathroom. In fact, I actually don't mind laughing with you about the nastiness and reality of childbirth. But you just can't do that with everyone...

When I'm home, relaxed, and somewhat used to this new life, (as well as actually able to semi-comfortably sit) I would love to have everyone come visit! This for me, is the ideal time for visitors. I'm home, I've recovered, I'm in the mood to be around people! At the hospital when I'm a swollen, bloody mess... no thank you.

So if you're like me- and you felt this way after giving birth- girl, you are NOT alone! And don't feel bad for not wanting visitors! I remember my dad kind of giving me a hard time about it when he was at the hospital visiting me- until I told him "well Dad, once you push a 10 pound baby out of your vagina- and get to deal with the after math, THEN we'll talk".  He laughed, but he definitely got the point, and guess what- no more comments about visitors! Spending the first couple days with your baby in the hospital, embarrassed to move, or feeling uncomfortable and awkward because of having visitors- that's not the way to spend your first days as Mom!

Any woman that has had a baby (and any man that has witnessed child birth) will understand...or SHOULD understand!
Take a couple days to privately recover- if that's what you need. That newborn baby won't change much within that first week! 

2 comments on "Visitors Right After Birth....No Thank You."
  1. haha lady bits! Puts things more in perspective- never thought about that part of having a baby!

    1. Oh Kelsey you just wait!! haha :) But you're definitely on the "allowed to visit at the hospital" list ;)


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